This Week's RED HOT Celebrity Birthday (2/1 - 2/7)

This Week's RED HOT Celebrity Birthday (2/1 - 2/7)
Eddie Bracken, best known for his role as Walley World owner Roy Walley in NATIONAL LAMPOON'S VACATION would be celebrating his 95th birthday on February 7th were it not for his death in 2002. The Montclair, NJ resident and star of radio, screen and stage, Bracken died several months after his wife/actress, Connie, passed away. if you make it to Heaven, be sure to check out Eddie and wife Connie in the highly entertaining BACK IN BRACKEN, a true favorite with the elderly deceased.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Katie Ledecky's Hairline Costs Her

Having just won a gold medal in the 800-meter freestyle, 15-year-old Katie Ledecky should soon be seeing a Brinks truck backing up to her family's Maryland home, but . . . "No, wait!"
Ledecky will shout.  "Where are you going?  Where's it going?" she will ask her mother, Mary Gen Ledecky.  But not even Mother Mary herself will come to Katie.  Yes, you know the rest.

So where is that Brinks truck going?  To Gabby Douglas's, that's where.  You see, Ledecky has age on her side--or a lack thereof--but what she has in age, she lacks (surprisingly) in a hairline.  And ain't no one wanna see a girl on no Wheaties box or in no Subway commercial with hair like dat! 
 

Above: Ledecky and her endorsement-costing hairline.

Meanwhile, Olympic gymnastics gold medalist Douglas, who is one year Ledecky's senior, already has racked up a deal with Kellogg's, gracing a box of Corn Flakes and getting ready to take part in "Kellogg's Tour of Gymnastics Champions," a 40-city tour. YAWWWWWWN.  Yeah, that last part sounds pretty lame, but Douglas is expected to net around $10 million between now and Rio's 2016 Games due to her million-dollar smile and normal hairline.
 

Above: All that glitters is not gold, it's Gabby.

True, you will see Ledecky again after these London Games, but it probably won't be for another four years, for there will be no endorsements, no talk show appearances, not even a guest role on a Nick Jr. or Disney Channel show.  "What about a movie of the week?" you ask.  To that I reply, "Who'll play her, former SNL comedienne Kristen Wiig as she looked in those Lawrence Welk sketches?"
 

Above: Wiig in an SNL skit looking much like Ledecky, not including the doll hands.