Spa Owner's Sperm Sparks Outrage

Shortly after the news last week that N.YC.'s SHIZUKA new york Spa was offering its clients the "Geisha Facial" (aka the "Bird Poop Facial") for $216 a poop . . . I mean pop, Jerry Haverty, the owner of the Atlanta-based Tranquility Day Spa, had an idea of his own.


* The Shizuka new york Spa, owned by Skizuka Bernstein, where Nightingale droppings are flown in from Japan and are used in a facial concoction that supposedly rids the skin of pollutants, clears pores, and evens out skin tone.

Haverty, a 64-year-old recently-accredited aesthetistician and proprietor of an establishment that opened in October of last year, has found himself in jail for the "Mommy Facial" he added to his spa's list of skin care offerings. This treatment, like the one offered by Shizuka Bernstein's Midtown Manhattan spa, is far from the everyday rejuvenator; however, according to some irate Atlanta residents and former Tranquility clients, Haverty's facial is nothing but a "pervert's potpourri." Oddly enough, the main ingredient of the "Mommy Facial" is semen; moreover, it is Haverty's own semen.

* Jerry Haverty (pictured left) with two Tranquility employees at the Atlanta-based day spa.

Jesse, a thirtysomething housewife and mother of three, who prefers her name be withheld from this article, was the customer who blew the whistle on the spa's owner and his cocktail. "I saw 'Mommy Facial' and thought nothing of it. It sounded different," recalled the Atlanta resident. "It was described by him [Haverty] as a new product that used a natural, milky extract. The smell was pungent and familiar, but, again, I thought nothing of it."

Later in the day, hours after the woman's spa appointment, her husband did think something of it when he went in for an end-of-the-workday kiss and was greeted by a personal odor. He suspected his wife of a possible affair, but a cooler head prevailed after his wife explained that she had had a "legitimate" facial.

Jesse's husband felt awkward contacting the local authorities due to the ridiculousness of the couple's claim and the embarrassment brought on by the offense, but he stated, "I know that smell. If I went to see that pervert myself, I'd be in prison on murder charges!"

Mr. Haverty was questioned at his home on Friday evening and immediately admitted to the charge, but he claimed that the customer knew about the contents of the "Mommy Facial" treatment. Whether Haverty's claim is true or not, he is currently being held on prostitution charges for applying his semen to another person's face even though the act was sex-free.