THIS WEEK'S SEPARATED AT BIRTH (10/5/09 - 10/11/09)

For those of you who remember well the '80s, Libyan leader Col. Muammar el-Qadaffi, better know by just his surname, made it into American headlines as President Reagan's "mad dog of the Middle East." But since then what the hell has happened to this once-hot leader?

In keeping with the '80s (and you devotees of this decade), Mr. Libya now looks like Sam Crenshaw of t.v.'s Today's Special (1982-1987). And if you don't remember T.S., a Canadian children's show that aired on Nickelodeon, shame on you!
Can it be that Qadaffi looks like the security guard puppet on a kids' show? Yes! Look at their eyes, their testicle sac noses, and their complexions. Ahhhh, if only puppet Sam had black wiry hair.

THIS WEEK'S SEPARATED AT BIRTH (9/21/09 - 9/27/09)

This just in: When the t.v. movie of Dr. Oz's downward spiral into hell is made, complete with cocaine binges, tranny prostitute orgies, and tri-weekly bus trips to Pocono casinos, DON SWAYZE will play the DOC! Yes, Patrick's recently bereft bro has the same chinny chin chin, nose and eyes as "The Great Oz." Sure, he's a little craggier and haggard than Oprah's guru, but it ain't nothing a little putty can't fix.

One Hollywood insider reports that the project hasn't been greenlighted yet, for Don Swayze is still in the process of sabotaging Oz's life so that he will eventually be led down a road of cocaine binges, tranny prostitute orgies, and tri-weekly bus trips to Pocono casinos. Like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz who met her three friends on the yellow brick road, Swayze's plan for the project will have Dr. Oz travel (on foot) from point A to point B, meeting a teenage cocaine dealer, a middle-aged tranny prostitute, and a WWII veteran casino bus driver along the way.

THIS WEEK'S SEPARATED AT BIRTH (9/14/09 - 9/20/09)

Did Tony Randall's itty bitty brother play mushroom-headed robot Twiki from Buck Rogers in the 25th Century? Based on appearances, you'd think that was the case; in reality the pint-sized actor is Italian native Felix Silla, who is still alive at the age of 73, making a living with his signature at Sci-Fi conventions like Buck Rogers himself, Gil Gerard.

While Tony Randall's claim to fame came with t.v.'s The Odd Couple as Felix Unger, Silla is credited with two classiv t.v. roles: Twiki and Couisin Itt from The Addams Family. You go Felix!!!

THIS WEEK'S SEPARATED AT BIRTH (8/31/09 - 9/6/09)

Former NFL player and ex-coach of Da Bears, Mike Ditka, obviously has NO RIGHT showing his skin to the sun (as evidenced by the picture above). But his lobster coloring, complete with sunglass marks, does make him look a helluva lot like Ron Pearlman's Hellboy character.

This Week's Separated at Birth (9/24 - 9/30)

The confetti-throwing, toupee-wearing comedian Rip Taylor is obviously not Tom Selleck's father due to Taylor's homosexuality, but there's no reason why he can't be Magnum's uncle.

A close look at both performers' eyes says it all, not to mention their similar eyebrows and moustaches. Even Rip's helmet hairpiece resembles what Selleck's coif may one day look like.

This Week's Separated at Birth (9/17 - 9/23)

Suzanne Sommers' overly botoxed lips are making her look more and more like Janice, the guitarist from the Muppets' "Electronic Mayhem Band." All Sommers has to do is start tanning daily to give her the orange Oompa Loompa tan. When that happpens, the HSN star will be ready to join the world's greatest puppet band!

This Week's Separated at Birth (9/3 -9/9)

* Dick York (top) and Jim Carrey (bottom) have the same swooping brown hair, pronounced chin and rubbery face, which makes me wonder, "Why did Will Ferrell play Darrin in the BEWITCHED film?" My media reports tell me that Carrey, who's no stranger to the biopic genre, will be playing Dick York on the silver screen should someone prove that York's life was interesting enough for moviegoers.